Dodo Leads the Board on a Tour

CEO (the dodo bird) led our board of directors on a tour of this building yesterday. He doesn't realize that it was just another nail in the coffin, so to speak. They took pictures of our outside wall that's starting to cave in (but according to CEO, that wall is fine), a support in one room is moving and has cracked the drywall (again, CEO says it's fine), and many other things that are wrong in everyone's eyes but his.

Some tidbits from the tour:

The president of the board arrived. Marilyn asked her to sign in and started telling her it was for safety in case there was an emergency. Before she could say it, CEO pipes in... "it's so we can identify the charred bodies if the building burns."

Another board member comes in carrying a camera. CEO looks at him and says without cracking a smile, "no cameras allowed." The board member had a confused look on his face. CEO told him he could take any pictures he wanted. Board member said it was so the board could have a record.

Same board member mentioned that he had just bought 8 gb of memory cards for his trip to China. CEO asks, "are you picking up a baby?"

After the board members left Monica asked how he thought it went. He replied, "do you have any marijuana?"

Remarks like this.... to the Board of Directors.... His friend on the board - who is a prior CEO here - didn't come for the tour... not sure how CEO functioned.... with the 2 of them sharing a brain....

The board president covered their ulterior motives pretty well. She walked into CEO's office (he had been cleaning it prior to their arrival) and asked if it was always that neat. Then she said she was going to come back unexpectedly in a few weeks and see if it was always like that. When the next board member walked into his office she recounted her comments to that person. If he thinks they're coming back in a few weeks to see if his office is neat.... he has no idea he's about to get the axe before that can ever happen.....

The person who will most likely be taking over .... is the person he's been trying to decide the best way to fire.... things have a way of working out.....

We get so excited about his impending removal from office that we sometimes break into the happy dance when no one is around! It's just not happening quick enough for us.....

Why Are You Dressed Up?

That was Squirrel's question to Dog today. He followed it up with "Wedding? Funeral?"

He's been "carrying the torch" for Dog for quite a few years, so his next response was whether she would be dressing up for a divorce and tried to say "divorce decree" but stumbled over it.... Marilyn "corrected" him (so she thinks) and told him it's "divorce degree".....

By the way.... she's dressed business casual.... nothing out of the ordinary......

Sorry. You Will Have to Cross Your Legs and Hold It.

....or make a trip to a neighboring business or home.

CEO decided that our floors in the breakroom/restrooms/halls needed to be stripped and waxed. Squirrel is over the maintenance/janitorial department, he and MG2 were the ones doing the work.

Squirrel, not wanting to inconvenience himself, decided that this would be done during the day instead of the usual overnight job.

So, instead of inconviencing himself, he caused a MAJOR inconvenience for the 60+ people in this building, leaving only 2 restrooms (single toilets in each) open. We have many people with disabilities who work here and that was even more of an inconvenience to them than us because of the location. It also took us below building code standards for the ratio of people to toilets.

This department opted to go on field trips during those two days.

Cat Coins a New Phrase....

To apply to our CEO....

It's hard to soar with eagles..... when your leader is a dodo bird.....

We hope we have news to report soon - that he is no longer our CEO.... We can dream, can't we???? Then we no longer have to hear sexist remarks.... or hear questions in management meetings such as, "did you get any nookie last weekend?" .... or, when hearing an accounting explanation that is factual and true, but he doesn't like, says, "you're high" or "you're full of it".

Crossing our fingers...... (yes - there are things blowing in the wind causing us to be hopeful)

Monica's Mad at Dad

Monica's mother died last year in another state. Soon after, her father starting dating someone and has now decided to get married. Monica has refused, to this day, to meet the woman. He had promised that he would wait one year before making any major decisions, that year is up in July. He's getting married in June.

He has wanted to sell the house for a few months, but needs Monica's and her brother's signatures. Brother is willing, Monica has been stalling to try to hold him to that one year promise. She realized that if he marries in June with the house not sold, it could affect how much she gets, not that the money matters (of course).

She says her big pet peeve is Person A (Dad) having Person B (brother) call to ask her to do something (this case), invite her somewhere, etc. Brother called to ask her to sign the papers. She was furious and told him that if Dad calls and asks her, she will sign.

Dad called while she was out (probably counted on that) and told her he would be at the house for one more hour and to call him. She doesn't have his girlfriend's phone number where he's staying most of the time, and was out longer than an hour. This was on Saturday.

On Monday, she gets a phone call from an attorney he's hired to force the sale who would rather talk to her counsel than to her, but is willing to talk to her. She calls and tells him to tell her dad to call her and she will sign.

On Friday, she gets a letter from the attorney and brings it in for us to read. Basically repeated the phone call .... but was FULL of typos. An attorney's letter. Grammatical errors. Spelling errors. Possessive errors. That's one attorney I would not hire for anything. I (Cat) wanted to get a copy of the letter, mark it up, and send it back to him when the whole ordeal is over. I've worked in a lawfirm. You do not allow such things to happen in that profession!

We hope this thing is over with soon.... We get tired of hearing about her dad and how she doesn't want to meet his girlfriend. And how he broke his promise of waiting a year for major decisions. Her mother had been sick and bedridden for years. At the end, I don't think she was even lucid. He was with her day in and day out. Let him enjoy life now....

Doc Marilyn's Snake Oil

Marilyn has lately taken to drinking cranberry juice. Lots of cranberry juice.

Dog and I each had colds - she somehow escaped catching one. Probably because she will spray anyone and everyone who sneezes or coughs.

JoeJack has one currently. She says if she doesn't catch his cold, she's going to drink cranberry juice for the rest of her life.

However .... she was out sick yesterday .... too much cranberry juice????

Squirrel's "Little Girl"

Marilyn and Squirrel were talking about a supply order. He said, "my little girl called to let me know she's going on vacation. She didn't want me to think she forgot about me." He was talking about a salesperson.

The supply houses have discovered.... if you send a woman.... he's 10 times more likely to buy from you.... especially if she's pretty and flirts.

The Wilma Update

The reason Wilma left was because she wanted to set her own work hours and her boss required her to work her regularly scheduled shift. Marilyn thinks that Wilma didn't trust Fred and wanted to be at home to watch him.

Wilma told several people that she didn't want to work. She wanted to stay at home and draw unemployment. If she got fired she could get welfare, too. {Too bad, she lost the unemployment hearing and wasn't fired so she can't get welfare!}

In the meantime, she and Fred have split up (again). Fred left her and took Bam-Bam's jar of coins (around $1,000). Fred is back on drugs and is working for JoeJack!!! {We made sure it was mentioned in front of Marilyn that drugs are involved. JoeJack has a history with drugs... we wonder if it's turning into a "present" with drugs.}

Wilma has met a guy online from Greece who is working in Africa. He calls her, but she won't call him because it costs $6/minute. {This screams con man to us!}

Monica found all of this out at the unemployment hearing.

Something we forgot to include in our Ode to Wilma poem..... Not too many days before she stormed out of here she told Dog that she had quit wearing make-up about a month prior. She wanted everyone to be embarrassed by her. We hadn't even noticed the change.

Run-Away Bride ... Ran Back AGAIN!

Run-Away Bride has returned to her groom once more.... Now she's pregnant. She says it's her husband's baby.

Poor kids.... both the one they have and the one to come.....

Update: Bride has been telling some people that it's her husband's baby.... and other people that she doesn't know who the father is.... we tend to believe she doesn't know....

She doesn't work here any longer - but she's here several times a week visiting her mother or just dropping by.

Wilma Lost Her Appeal!

We won the first round of Wilma's unemployment application. She appealed. We received the judgment in the mail 3 days after the hearing. This is the fastest we've ever received an unemployement ruling! Judge saw right through her!

We will post some updates in the next couple of days - just wanted to share that info!